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Fort Taylor Pyrate Invasion/ Pirates in Paradise Celebration
Nov/Dec 2011 - Key West, FL
Chapter 6th: The surgeon recounts his time spent at the blacksmith's; venturing out onto the fort wall at Wendy's behest to view the sunset; Taking the bus to the parade; Getting ready and waiting for the parade; Then not participating in the parade; Dinner at Abondonza's; A cigar store and a lifelong dream nearly, but not quite, fulfilled at the Green Parrot Bar.
Photo: Beowulf
Wasabi had been over to my table earlier to show me the carpenter's saw he made. Wasabi was running the forge at
this event. He left it with me, so I showed it around during a couple of my presentations while explaining
that germs weren't very well understood during the period. Because of this, the surgeon would sometimes borrow the carpenter's saw
when his saw blade broke. As I was folding up shop, it occurred to me that I should return it. So I took it with
me as I went off to search for Stynky, who (as you'll recall from the previous chapter) was leaving "right
now." I didn't find Stynky. Rather than worry about him, I visited the forge to return Wasabi's
saw.
Wasabi had Leatherback and Youngblood assisting him at the forge. I handed him his saw. "What do you think of it?" I told him it was nice work and that I had used it in my display. He seemed please by that. Wasabi is one of those irrepressible people who always has a twinkle in his eye and is eager to tell you a story. He has a great deal of knowledge about blacksmithing and piracy which he freely shares. He told me that he loved to make things like the saw and was happy to have the fort forge to use for his projects.
 Photo: Mission Wasabi running the blacksmith's forge |
Photo: DB CouperLeatherback working iron |
Photo: Mission Wendy texting while she waits |
While Wasabi and I were talking, Wendy Wellman spotted me. She had been sitting on a bench alongside the forge. "I was looking for you!" "Me?" "Yeah! I wanted to kidnap you to go and watch the sun set over the fort wall." I had an errand to run, but I promised her I'd return so we could see the sun set.
Some of you may recall from the previous chapter that I was going to return to my condo to update the on-line Journal. Ah, the best laid plans... it's far more fun to go and do anything with Wendy than sit in my condo typing on my laptop, so that was scuttled. Wendy is another irrepressible spirit. She actually bounces up and down when telling you something that excites her. How can a computer compete with that?
Photo: Mission
Photo: Mission
Wendy and I climbed
up to the fort wall to watch the sunset. DB Couper and his wife appeared and DB started telling us jokes,
none of which I can reprint here. (This is not because they were naughty or offensive - which they were - but
because I can't remember a joke to save my life.)
Greg Hudson and Sherry soon joined our little sunset-watching crowd, climbing up onto the fort wall to better observe. I pointed out an iguana which DB's wife had found resting halfway down the fort wall. Greg and Sherry peered over the edge and found another one! I guess the fort wall is a major attraction for local iguanas.
Photo: Mission
We took several pictures, although my bruised shoulder and wrist had really stiffened up; all this climbing on to
and off of the wall was not helping at all. Still, Wendy is so animated that you can hardly say no when she asks you climb
a little fort wall. She particularly wanted to get a good shot of me for the Journal
like the one she got last year.
She futzed with my little Canon and got it into a sunset mode where it will remain until someone else futzes with
my camera. (I need glasses to read the screen and have never been that interested in learning its intricacies. I
bought it mainly for its point-and-shoot capability.)
While on the wall, Wendy insisted I put on my hat. This concerned me because the wind was blowing in just the right direction that if I stood where she wanted, the wind could carry it into the moat. I've heard bad things about the contents of the moat and was afraid the brown felt might dissolve if it came in contact with that soup.
It did, in fact, blow off several times, but never into the moat. The sun set eventually did set, going behind the clouds. Wendy apologized for this as if she could control the sun.
 Photo: Beowulf Beowulf's photo of me at sunset |
 Photo: MissionOne view of the sunset we saw |
Photo: Mission Rebecca in the sunset |
Photo: Mission
The parade gang ready: Jack, Mae, Brig and your author
Someone in the fort started yelling that the last bus for the parade was leaving. I decided to hie
down to the fort, find the twins and avoid getting kidnapped again. The twins were busily making themselves up at their tent when I arrived. Jack had been on and off about going (what with his feet and all)
finally deciding to go. Mae and Brig brought candy to throw. Naturally I started eating that. They finished getting read and we clambered onto the bus.
Almost. For who should I run into when I reached the last bus to the parade but... Stynky! Here was my long-missing ride to the condos. "Are you ready?" he asked. "For what?" I replied. "To go back to the condo." "I thought you were leaving right away?!" I told him I was taking the last bus to the parade.
Photo: Mission
Ratbeard sings his hits
The bus trip was pretty uneventful, nothing at all like the bus trip in 2007 where people were jammed tightly
together, all singing sea shanties together. On board were Jack, Mae, Brig and I, Beowulf, Shay, madPete, a very
colorful guy who I didn't know and Redbeard.
Photo: Beowulf
Ratbeard and one of his rats
Redbeard was singing a shanty that I think he may have written himself. Not that I would know, since I can't
remember songs with more than two verses in them. He also had two rats on his shoulder whom Handsome Devlin claimed
were named Jezebel and Juliet. I asked him if he was Ratbeard, which he adamantly stated he was
not. He explained that while several people had called him Ratbeard, that was someone else
entirely. He was Redbeard. From the 2009 Journal, regular readers may recall that
he told your author that he could be called either. So it's difficult
Photo: Beowulf
Shay, madPete and the colorful guy we don't know
to say what the truth might be here. Not that these Journals have ever claimed to be remotely
accurate.
Shay and madPete asked to be taken to the Rum Barrel, which the bus driver cheerfully agreed to do. The driver was a nice guy and willing to go along with all manner of foolishness. It never occurred to me to photograph him and now that he's been mentioned here, I am going to be kicking myself for the next five minutes. (Not something everyone can do, especially with a bum shoulder.)
When we got to the Rum Barrel, Shay and mP debussed. I suggested that if our group also got off, we could avoid a mile and a half of walking on pavement in period shoes. (Our original plan was to walk the parade and then dine at the Rum Barrel.) Brig was determined to be in the parade, however, so we stayed on the bus.
The bus let us off near the beginning of the parade. The colorful guy we didn't know suggested we just stay there and wait for the parade to start so that we could join it when it when the pirates got to us. That sounded pretty good...for about two minutes. Then I suggested we go find the pirates. Naturally the pirates were somewhere near the end of the parade. Mae, Brig and Jack hadn't gotten too much sleep and were still a bit road weary, so they eventually elected to sit on the sidewalk while we waited.
Photo: Mission
Photo: Mission
I saw Mike the Skeleton Pirate getting out his skull mask. I asked him if it was comfortable and he replied, "Not really." He said there was padding inside,
but it was pretty old. The airflow was a bit limited, except through the eye hole and the mouth when it was open.
"Sometimes I open my mouth in pictures just to cool my neck," he explained. I guess the mask had to be
tightly attached to him to pull off his statue bit. It's still really cool, but hearing the details makes you realize how we must all
suffer for our art. Or something.
Pirates are pretty colorful on their own, but stick them in a parade and... well! So I thought I'd share some of the photos that were taken of the parade.
Photo: Caribbean PearlPirate captains convene: Capts. Black, Fromage and Bluebeard |
Photo: Beowulf Our hero Beowulf in his beloved, specially-made Captain Lynch pirate hat |
Photo: Mission Cannibal Chrispy, er, driving. Do you suppose he has insurance? |
Here are a few from the actual parade and one of the twins with Mike, the skeleton pirate. (Since that's probably what a lot of you want to see here. Even if you don't, it's what I want to see here.)
 Photo: Caribbean PearlThe float with Braze and C. Pearl as the mermaid |
 Photo: Beowulf A jaunty woman at the ship's wheel |
 Photo: Mission Mae, Mike (the skeleton) and Brig |
Photo: Mission
I wonder what Mae & Brig were doing?
Mae was looking a bit uneasy and mentioned that she was developing a headache. The parade was doing a great job of
not getting started and, after nearly an hour of inaction, Brig announced that Mae needed to get some food and asked us if
we wanted to bail. Since I was only there to avoid getting kidnapped, I readily agreed and Jack was for it. Since they had no idea where we were, I led the way.
Friends, if you thought Mission's Key West Dead Reckoning System™ sounded like a bad idea when driving, you should have seen it in when we were walking. I explained that it would be best to take the back roads to avoid the parade crowd. Parts of Key West are marvelously set up for walking. Then there was the route we took. We finally found Whitehead street and I knew the system had worked once again - albeit just as badly as it ever does. We agreed an Italian restaurant called Abondonza. The food was good although the service was slow. In the waitress's defense, she did get us bread promptly, causing Mae to bloom and rejoin the living.
On the way back to the condo, Brig announced that she really, really wanted to have a shot in the Green Parrot bar because she had passed it so many times, but had never been there. Everyone agreed that this was a good plan. Before we could do that, however, Jack wanted to find a cigar shop. I suggested we walk on Duval as there was not likely to be a cigar store on Whitehead.
We found the Island Cigar Factory ("Cuban leaf cigars") on Duval along the way. So Mission's Key West Dead Reckoning System™ does work sometimes. Jack went in purchased three hand-rolled cigars while Brig, Mae and I goofed around. Brig insisted upon posing with the Island Cigar Factory's wooden Indian (which every cigar shop is required to have by law) as you see below right. The Indian was holding something under his left arm, so Brig grabbed my leftovers box and held it firmly under her arm. Mae laughed and said the Chinese food box was the perfect accessory.
Photo: Mission Jack selecting cigars (Looks shady, doesn't he?) |
Photo: Mission Mission in shop (also shady) |
Photo: Mission Brig and her new best friend |
We then set off towards the Green Parrot. Once inside, I noticed that they had added a whole new section with a
second bar (presumably for back-up - in case the main is unable to fulfill its duties) and, naturally, a T-Shirt Shop. (I guess every bar in Key West now has a separate T-Shirt shop - a trend first started by Sloppy Joe's Tourist Mecca.) When I used to
Photo: Mission
come down here 10 or 15 years ago the Parrot was mostly filled with locals and dogs. (Yes, dogs. I saw a lady buy her
dog a beer once at the Green Parrot.) Now they had a T-Shirt shop!
It was very crowded, so we stood along a small table top near the empty band stage. Jack got Brig her shot of rum and he and I two beers. The price? $17.50! (Somehow I think the locals go elsewhere now.) Brig sipped her shot and set it down while we observed the crowd.
Brig soon proclaimed that we needed to pose for photos of this fulfillment of her life's desire, so she gathered Mae and I and grabbed my camera. Poor Mae had been looking at the Chinese food box container and accidentally knocked Brig's shot over. So much for Brig fulfilling her lifelong dream of having a shot in the Green Parrot.
For some reason no one wanted to ask someone else to shoot a photo of the four of us, so we took two photos with
different people snapping the photo. (Why we chose the two most charming members of our party not to
Photo: Mission
be in both photos instead of Jack or I took is a question for the ages.)
Some guy came over and asked us if we were working in the fort or at the carnival. We said we were with the fort and he went on to tell us about this amazing guy who had explained knot tying to him. (That would be Captain R. Hood, my neighbor.) Small world, eh? Jack smoked one of his cigars, reveling particularly in using a little portable torch he had also purchased at the cigar shop. I think he let the cigar go out a couple of times just so he could re-light it with that thing.
On the way out, Rob Zerr spotted us and started razzing us about being lightweights. In fact, as Jack noted, we had much more affordable and better stock back at the fort, so why hang in the Parrot?
By now, my shoulder and wrist pain were getting annoying, so I elected to go back to my condo. We bid each other good night. Maybe I am a lightweight after all.