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Fort Taylor Pyrate Invasion, Dec 2014 - Key West, FL

Chapter 5: Saturday, December 6th, Day. Of the surgeon's arrival and giving presentations; going out to the battle and visiting each of the three pirate positions on the battlefield, providing a nauseating amount of detail about this; a cautionary tale about gunpowder burns and why the surgeon is useless for treating such; of Nita Treasure, a fascinating piratess, how the surgeon performed surgery on Nobudy (No, that's his name: Nobudy. I may never get tired of that joke.), of Don Johnson, who invites an entirely different kind of name joke (poor Don), what happened to the Side-Attack Cannon Crew, the final melee and a bunch of pictures of corpses. (It's a long chapter.)

I arrived at the fort around 12:30 and began presentations on the golden age of piracy era surgery almost immediately. There was quite a bit of traffic and a lot of interest and interesting questions. I was very involved in what was going on in front of me, so when I turned around to find the Mercury camp almost deserted, I was shocked! Steve told me that everyone had gone off to battle.  So I decided to go too.

Photo: Mission - The Surgeon's Display on Saturday. Notice the addition by Dave?

Photo: Poppa Ratsey
The Side Attack Position on Saturday - Shana,
Keith, Dave, Leigh & Jeremy on the Cannon I hadn't really planned to participate in the battle, I just wanted to watch and take pictures. I didn't bring anything with me (like a certain syringe regular readers will be familiar with). The battle tableau was set for a three point attack by the pirates. The British had their backs to the fort that they were protecting, with Laurance the Viceroy leading them. The small arms were set on the prompt side of the Brits and Keith and Lily had their cannon perched behind a pile of brush on the opposite prompt. The pirates' primary cannon force was deployed opposite the Brits, with the pirates' backs to the water.

Coming onto the battlefield from the right side (when looking at the fort), I first encountered Keith and Lily, so I chatted with them and Mercury crew members Dave and Jeremy who made up the balance of the Side-Attack Cannon Crew for a bit. They were scheduled to appear from the wings at some opportune moment and fire two shots. Keith announced he was going to walk over and see how the pirate cannon crews at the waterside were doing, so I went with him.

There had been a bit of a flap at the firing demonstration yesterday when Drake and Catalina De
Photo: Mission
Grace Treating Catalina's Burns on Friday Alquezar had gotten burned while preparing their cannon. Some powder had accidentally been ignited by the linstock (which contains a slow match - a rope treated to burn slowly), so everyone was wearing extra heavy gloves today. It had been sort of funny to watch Leigh of the Side-Attack Cannon Crew trying desperately to pick fuses for their cannon out of the fuse box while wearing such bulky padded gloves.

I had seen Catalina in the FTPI camp headquarters tent yesterday with her arm elevated and covered with some white burn cream after the incident. There was some interest from those on the battlefield today about what me as the surgeon would have been done to treat her and Drake during period. (There is a whole article about period treatment of burns among my "serious articles." Butter, oil and onions were among the popular options.) It took me a second to
Photo: Mission -Catalina's Bandage on Saturday recall these things today when there was no emergency, so it probably would have taken me several more minutes before I recovered from stunned mullet mode had I actually been there when it happened the day before. I'm not a doctor, I only play one at events. Fortunately we have several real nurses who are reenactors.

I was delighted to see Catalina on the field with her crew despite her accident, so I want over to talk with her. She had her arm all bandaged and said that although it had blistered, she was able to manage pretty well with Tylenol. I commented that it was neat that she had gotten back on the horse after falling off. She replied that while true, she was now being very conscious of the way in which she handled the powder and linstock.

I hadn't yet decided which group I was going to hang around with once the battle commenced. I mainly wanted to hang back and get some pictures.

Photo: Poppa Ratsey- The Pirate Cannon Line in Front of the Water with America 2.0 & Jolly II Rover Passing Behind

Photo: Lady Chaos Carol
The All Girl's Cannon Crew (& Poppa) in Their Minion Gear:
Anna Marie, Nita Treasure, Poppa, Lady Chaos Carol & Jaded Jetty There were several cannons set up at the water's edge for battle, including the all girl's cannon crew from the past few years. They were all dressed in yellow shirts and back pants and bodices. Keith said, "Oh, look! It's the Honey Nut Cannon Crew!" They didn't seem to appreciate the humor, but I told them I would be sure to record it for posterity.

From a later discussion with Nita Treasure, I learned that they were not dressed like that to emulate the Honey Nut Cheerio mascot, but in an homage to the minions from the Despicable Me franchise. Nita explained that both she and
The Minion Cannon Crew in their Minion Gear Felicity liked them. "I asked Jaded Jetty about making some clothes for us (she is an amazing seamstress) and the rest is history. We didn't want our outfits to SCREAM minions, however, so we simply went with the yellow shirts and black bloomers. We had considered blue but I thought that would be too obvious. The results are that we looked more like a homage to honey bees than minions, and that's okay too. We got a kick out of it and enjoyed that others seemed to also." So that was extremely cool. (I've noticed that a lot of female reenactors seem to love the minions.)

Personally, I would advise anyone wanting to emulate something to just give in and SCREAM whatever it was you were trying to portray. From my experience, the odds are even the biggest fans of something won't be sure what you're doing unless you're actually wearing minion masks.

Since I was chatting with Nita, I decided to find out about her. I had mentioned the idea to Leigh last year, who encouraged me. "She's a fascinating person," Leigh noted.

Nita
Photo: Nita's Camera
Nita & Jaded Jetty in Front of El Galeon has been playing pirate since 2009, with her first Fort Taylor attendance taking place in 2010. She enjoys the people at events - both the reenactors and the public. She told me she was also drawn to the black powder side of the hobby.

"I started with a flintlock pistol and quickly acquired a blunderbuss, and another pistol. I have spent a lot of time on Pyracy Pub, particularly in the Ship's Armory, absorbing information on black powder. Cascabel's article series 'Flintlocks 101', originally printed in No Quarter Given, is a wonderful source of information. I completed the National Park Service's Historic Weapons Program at Castillo de San Marcos National Monument in April 2012, proudly earning my Cannon Certification. LadyChaos Carol and I partnered on the purchase of a small cannon last year. I also own a small howitzer and recently purchased my beautiful breech loading cannon from Campbell Cannons earlier this year. I still enjoy firing small arms, but cannons hold my heart at this time. I have a lot to learn and I really enjoy events like FTPI where I can watch, practice and learn from the best of the best black powder experts."

Photo: Lady Chaos Carol
Nita At Fisherman's Village Pirate
Fest - Harley Quinn Socks? That is some more enthusiasm for black powder. (How many women do you know who own a small howitzer?)

Nita is currently teaching college courses, something she began doing after the bank at which she was the Senior Vice President, Chief Information Officer was bought out. She started teaching to supplement her income as an information technology consultant, a role which has grown to teaching four different courses at both Palm Beach State College and South University in Florida. Her classes include MicroComputer Applications (MS-Office), Project Management, Management Information Systems and Intro to the Internet. I asked what her favorite part of teaching was and she said it was "seeing that "Ah ha!" moment when a new skill is learned or students finally "get it!" I love it when students tell me that they have been able to apply what they've learned in class, and/or impressed their family, coworkers or managers with their newly acquired knowledge and skills."

When Nita is not playing pirate or teaching,
Photo: Nita's Camera - Nita Flying she likes to be out flying. She bought a Pirate Air/Katybird N9871B airplane from a co-worker after her interest was peaked by flying with her pilot friend on business trips in the early 90s. Nita started taking lessons in 1991, earning her private pilot's license in record time, solo-flying at 8.7 hours. She eventually got involved in cross-country air racing and did a lot of flying in the Bahamas. Job changes and the move to South Florida put the brakes on flying for about 10 years.

She regained interest in the sport again a few years ago and now flies out of an airport in Palm Beach County, Florida. She is the Secretary of the Florida Goldcoast 99's and works part-time for Platinum Aviation flight school. "If I had plenty of money and didn't have to work, I would fly every day! Unfortunately, neither is true, so I fly when I can find the time and the money."

In true pirate fashion, Nita has two Congo African Grey parrots – a male named Joey and female named Charlie. In not quite so pirate fashion, she also has a Long-Haired Chihuahua called Cisco and a Blue Merle Miniature Australian Shepherd named Willow. "I love to sing, but am terrible at it, so usually the only ones that hear me sing are my birds and dogs!"

---

While I was admiring the cannons, Deadeye appeared. He was carrying two LARP (live action role playing) swords. Because we did so well during last year's inspection of the event, we have been allowed to do sword-fighting this year using LARP swords by the Florida Park folks. Deadeye offered the pair of them to me. "Can you tell the difference?" he asked. "One's bigger than the other." I replied. "It's also twice as expensive!" He told me how much they were, but I don't recall exactly. I want to say one was about $100 or so and the other was close to $200. But don't quote me on that.

Photo: Mission Deadeye with the LARP Swords

Photo: Mission A Sword-by-Sword Comparison. The Bigger One is More Expensive. (Obviously)

Photo: Mission - Small Arms Men Waiting in the Shade
From Left - Jamie Spiering , Larry Wasabi and Captain Jim Since I was making the rounds and the battle had not yet begun, I decided to toddle over and see the small arms pirates who were gathered on my left. I trudged across the field, keeping well out of the line of the cannon maws.

The small arms group was being led by Larry Wasabi. Their position was the best because they were all gathered at the edge of the field in the shade. (They're no fools. It was a beautiful, cloudless Key West afternoon, which meant the sun beat down mercilessly.) Captain Jim (clearly the Captain of the Mercury) was among the small arms-men, but everyone was busily preparing their weapons, so I didn't want to bother him. (This is notable, given that I usually go out of my way to bother him. But if I went over to see him, I'd have to cross in front of all those folks loading their guns.  Captain Jim was also loading his gun, so bothering him just then, in front of all his gun-loading friends, seemed imprudent.)

Photo: Mission
Nobudy in the Shade. (Well, somebody in the shade.) Sara Loss's husband Nobudy was the only one standing in the shade not doing anything, so I gravitated to him. Like attracts like. He asked if I had brought my clyster syringe, which I admitted I had not. He suggested I carry his flask of water and use that as a medicinal aid, which seemed like a bright idea to me. So I took it.

"How come you're not preparing your gun?" "Oh, I'm just the sacrificial lamb. I'm here to die when it's time." "Maybe we could revive you." I pointed to the water.  He seemed to agree with that, so we stood in the shade and waited for our chance to play act a surgery.

Once the battle had begun, Nobudy and I marched out and watched the small arms crew firing. DB Couper was also there, taking photos. He explained to me that they had coordinated photographers this year and there was (presumably) a photographer with each group.

Photo: Mission - Small Arms Firing

Photo: Mission - Small Arms Advancing

Photo: Poppa Ratsey- The Small Arms Line Firing

Photo: DB Couper
Curing Nobody with Water
(Curing Somebody with Water)
Photo: DB Couper
Still Curing Nobudy
(Still Curing Somebody) After a few rounds, the pirates advanced a little and then fired again. This was apparently the time for Nobudy to keel over, so I ran over to treat him. He told me to pour the water on his face, which I was a bit shy about doing. After encouraging me several times not to worry about how much water I used, I went ahead a poured. He spluttered and shook theatrically, something of which DB got lots of photos.

Having been on the fort wall with the crowd watching the battle in the past, I wondered if our little vignette was even noticed by the public. Later on that afternoon, some of the folks who stopped by to see the display asked if I was the one who had treated the fallen pirate. I was most pleased our little skit had come off well.

Having done my bit for dramatic battle fare, I wandered around the perimeter of the field while the cannon-fire continued and made my way back to the pirate cannons, stopping to take a few photos there.

Photo: Mission Approaching the Pirate Cannon Line

Photo: Mission Pirates Preparing Their Cannons to Fire at the British

Photo: Mission Mermayde Cannoneers Jordan Foster and Doug Rankin

Photo: Mission Cannon Crew Swabbing - Don Johnson, Catalina de Al de Alquezar & "Pasha"

Photo: Mission Mermayde Master Gunner Roderic Hawkins and Kathryn Ramsey

Among the cannoneers seen above is Don Johnson - he's wearing a white outfit with a bowler hat. Don is a Key West native who seemed to be very active in the background of the event this year. (The Fort Taylor Pyrate Invasion requires a lot of organization and running around to keep things running smoothly.) Every year many locals pitch in and help, including some newbies like Don, who go above and beyond to answer the call.

Photo: Poppa Ratsey - Don Johnson and His Bowler Hat Don was unusual for a pirate reenactor in that he started dressing the part while at sea instead of on land. He began doing this in 2011 when he crewed aboard the Hawaiian Chieftain at the Grey's Harbor Historical Seaport Authority in Aberdeen, Washington. "When I was on the HC we stopped in Sacramento for 2 months and that was where I got adopted in to the pirate community." He told me that the chance to work on a tall ship was heaven, allowing him to channel a bit of Errol Flynn. "I think it was the lure of the sea and the adventure that drew me to the pirate life."

He's worked on tall ships for several years, having the opportunity to travel the coast of Washington and California in the Hawaiian Chieftain, where he was the Gunner and engineer. Following that he joined the crew of the HMS Bounty, which brought him to Europe for nine months. He worked as the assistant Gunner for the Bounty. "Then I got a job offer with the Liberty Clipper and spent the winter in the Bahamas. When we came back to Boston, I had to go up to Maine to prep a new ship that the Liberty Clipper's owners had just bought."

After meeting a special girl, he moved ashore in Rockland, Maine. The relationship didn't last and he found himself living on a sailboat in Portland "with the temp -20 outside and maybe 25 in the boat." For some reason this inspired him to seek warmer climes. Having visited Key West a couple of times, "I said to myself if I ever got off a boat and went somewhere to live that would be it. I have been here since the end of January, 2014."

Don
Photo: Don Johnson's Camera
Don as a Gunner Shipboard says it wasn't until Fort Taylor that he actually got seriously involved with a pirate event on land. He noted that he liked the pirate gathering at Fort Taylor for its community and the support the participants give each other. In addition, he loves "to lift the veil and teach people what life was like and 'un-Disnefy' some of the myths. When I was working with the kids on Hawaiian Chieftain, it was so rewarding to teach them what a true sailors life was like."

Professionally, Don is the former star of Miami Vice. (OK, OK, no, he isn't. You knew I'd have to stick that in here somewhere, though.) Actually, he is currently a boat mechanic who works as an outside contractor with the navy. With the help of a crew, he keeps oil
Photo: Don Johnson's Camera
Don and a Parrot response boats ready for use. "I have always been a tinkerer and messed about with any thing with moving parts all my life. Before I got my Captain's License, I was a fleet manager for a Y Camp for 7 years. I took care of any thing that they could throw at me or left in the box in my shop." Since that couldn't possibly be enough to do, Don also designs web sites.

These jobs are just the tip of the iceberg, however. In his very storied career, Don has had a wide variety of curious and interesting jobs. He's worked in several ship yards, and used to own a business that stuffed cotton and oakum in the seams of wooden boats. He worked in Alaska as a lodge mechanic and boat driver. He spent time working for a One hour Mini photo lab and has even dressed up as Chuck E. Cheese (although he only stuck with that job for a day.)

Not to limit his experience, Don also crewed for Santana, the Moody Blues and Barry Manilow. Long time readers may recall that I once accused another road band worker - our own Cannibal Chrispy - of working for Barry. Now I've found someone who actually has! I asked him for a good Barry story. He explained that at the concert he worked, "I ran a follow spot while sitting on the lighting truss. All of his road cases were named after battleships [because they ] were so large and heavy." (Huh. So Barry is a diva?)

---

Having exhausted my interest in the cannons and their crews, I wandered over to Keith and Leigh's position to watch the action by the Side-Attack Cannon Crew. The Honey Nut/Minion Cannon Crew had taken position of there and were firing a sort of deck gun at the British to help the Side-Attack Cannon Crew to make their point..

Photo: Mission The Side-Attack Cannoneers Await The Signal

Photo: Mission Honey Nut Minions & Deadeye Watch Side-Attack Cannon Crew Preparing to Fire

I would be remiss if I didn't also mention the British cannon line. They were under orders of the Viceroy, who happened to own the largest cannons in camp. Their role was to defend the fort. Now if I were defending the fort, I would be inside, firing my cannons from behind all that brick. However, they were out in front of the moat in the most indefensible position on the battleground. (This was mostly due to Florida Park rules which prohibit us from firing cannons from the fort wall. You have to balance realism with structural considerations, I suppose.)

Photo: Mission - The British Fort Defense. Note the tourists watching the battle from the wall. Pretty good crowd, eh?

After the Side-Attack Cannon Crew had fired their last round, the three pirate groups charged the British position and chaos ensued. I went along and got some nice photos of the carnage. This is where the sword fights took place, although I failed to capture any of them dramatically.

Photo: Mission - Running...

Photo: Mission - ...Fighting...

Photo: Mission - ...Winning!

Photo: Mission A British Scrum with Swords

Photo: Mission The Pirates Win an Celebrate Their Victory

Photo: Mission Zatara, The British Holdout

Photo: Mission - Lily/Leigh Collins, Happily Deceased in Battle (Based on the grin, she was happy.) There was a fair bit of carnage on the field after the battle ended. Much of it consisted of defeated British soldiers who really had nothing more to do once they were attacked. There were some pirates in there as well, however. In fact, the entire Side Attack Cannon Crew appears to have been killed, save for Keith, who had another role to fulfill...

It actually would have been a fine day to bring the clyster syringe out given all the wanton human destruction, but I wasn't at all sorry not to have it. Too much of a good (by which I mean "dumb") thing is just too much.

Photo: Mission Side-Attack Cannoneer Dave - Look at those socks... maybe it was best this way.

Photo: Mission S-A Cannoneer Jeremy's Demise

And that was the battle, at least as I saw it. Of course, other things were afoot. (The game, for example, was afoot.) Even more afoot, or at least on foot and seen rapidly leaving the scene of the battle, was the Viceroy. Fortunately, like Sherlock Holmes himself, the ever intrepid Keith was hot on the trail of this 17th century Moriarty, with Captain "Watson" Jim following closely behind to apprehend the Viceroy's henchman, Cannibal Chrispy.

Photo: Mission Keith Stops Viceroy & Chrispy's Escape

Photo: Mission After the Viceroy Ran, Keith Athletically Pursued

Photo: Mission The Viceroy and Chrispy Captured!

Once the pirates caught Chrispy and the Viceroy, they were led into camp for the traditional Saturday jibing and mocking combined with a dash of humiliation. (The pirates have to take their satisfaction where they can get it, I guess.)

Photo: Poppa Ratsey
Michelle 'Narrating' the Battle in Her Dulcet Tones Somehow Michelle Murillo had gotten involved with all this. I should explain that Michelle had been stationed on the fort wall to explain and get the crowd involved in what was going on on the battlefield. (As I noted previously, you can't hear a bloody thing being said on the battlefield unless they really yell and project their voices, so it helps to have someone narrate.) Michelle had been inciting the crowd against the pirates, which sort of makes sense; the British were supposed to be defending the fort from the pirates, after all.

When the Viceroy was capture, she came down from the fort wall to the camp to be part of the Viceroy's humiliation. (She was presumably leading the crowd who could actually see the Viceroy's run for freedom - something for which the fort wall would have been exceptionally good.)

Now here it gets sort of confusing as to what actually happened and since I wasn't there, I have to rely on third party accounts.

Captain Jim says, "I granted the Viceroy clemency and allowed him to 'Take this bloody rag back to his Bloody King etc., etc.' and allowed him to depart with his colors. Michelle kept promising to make sure he didn't escape. She was somewhat less than helpful in this role being, as she is, enamored of the Viceroy. No accounting for taste, it seems."

Photo: Poppa Ratsey
Viceroy Led to Humiliation by Capt. Jim Papa Ratsey (who took all these photos) said, "Though I was just a witness, it seemed to me that Diosa was tossing the Viceroy under the keel, and turning pirate. A change of heading so to speak."

madPete (Peter Chaaps) added, "Aye! we must rescue her from the King's Minions."

Caribbean Pearl explains, "Diosa was captured fer association wit' the Viceroy by pirates when the red lobsters lose the battle. She was tryin' ta' make her 'scape...didn't work. Then the Viceroy was usin' her body as a shield."

Hamilton Berger was Wronged Captain Jim added, "And then Diosa used Chrispy as a shield... I was going to 'retain' Diosa until I realized what trouble she would cause amongst the crew."

Michelle herself says, "I much preferred Poppa and Peter Chaaps version that I was innocent and should be rescued to the truth."

So if you can untangle all that, good on ya'. I, for one, am reminded of the psychological tendency towards confirmation bias, which makes most witness testimony unreliable folderol, despite what you've seen on procedural cop shoes and Perry Mason.

Photo: Poppa Ratsey Michelle, Chrispy & Viceroy Accused

Photo: Poppa Ratsey Michelle Arguing with Jim for the Viceroy

Photo: Poppa Ratsey Viceroy and Chrispy Humbled and Chastened

Photo: Mission
Michael the Surgeon. Note That He is Wearing the Patrick Hand Original™ Planter's Hat Back in camp, Michael Bagley had apparently filled in for me while I was gone. It never ceases to amaze me how easily people seem to pick up my patter. (Could this have something to do with the fact that I repeat most of the stories a dozen or two times every day? Nah...)

Michael seemed ready to relinquish the post, so I resumed my station. Every year we seem to get more and more people walking through and I get better and better questions. I spent a brisk afternoon, explaining my character's trade until the fort was closed to the public. Jessica and Michael had planned to dine at Café Sole tonight and I had invited myself to go with them, so I was looking forward to that.

Photo: Mission - Mark Dauck, Died With His Boots On (And his sword & bucket)

Photo: Mission - Bawdy Be, Dead on the Cannon

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