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Pirate Fest, June 2013 - Put-in-Bay, OH

T&J's Smokehouse
Photo: Terry Smith
Chapter 3: Of Friday evening, which began by Heading back to camp; Fortuitously finding the rest of the crew along the way at T & J 's SmokeHouse (formerly the Crescent Tavern from Journals past); Finding the Twins from last year and meeting (or perhaps 're-meeting) Tonika; Riding sidesaddle at the bar; Ambling off with some of the crew to The Round House Bar; Ditching them and going back to camp and Heading for the place where all evenings end for the pirate re-enactors in Put-in-Bay.

Eventually the rain wore itself out and settled into a light spatter that was navigable, even in layers of wool and linen. So we took our leave of Pasquales. Bryan, Mary Diamond and Cheeky Actress were all concerned about seeing what had happened to their tents during the storm, meaning we walked towards the Site A encampment.

Along the way, we passed T&J's SmokeHouse, which regular readers will recall as the location of the mechanical bull that various people (and stuffed monkeys) The T&Js Dinner Crew
Photo: Michael Colossimo - The T&J's Dinner Crew
rode last year. The bull looked sort of forlorn in the squalls of rainfall; there were clearly not going to be any drunk riders tonight if the weather kept up. (Not that anyone would have been drinking when they decided to ride the bull last year. Never!)

While I was musing on the bull, someone (probably Cheeky) spotted our crew hanging out inside having dinner, so we burst onto the scene. Most of our little Pasquale's crew wandered over to chat with our fellow pirates, but not me. I had spotted the twins from last year and immediately went to talk to them. (I was really curious if they had seen the Journal... and if they had seen it, if it made any sense to them.) Last year's readers may remember that I didn't know their names when I had written the Journal and that I had sent them an email to which they hadn't responded.

The Twins, Mission and Tonika
Sofia, Tonika, Mission and Mariq
So I set about straightening this bit of business out immediately. First, their names are Mariq and Sofia. I had sent the email to Mariq While she didn't respond in time for the publish of the 2012 Put-in-Bay Journal, she did respond. She told me she would answer the questions when she got a chance. They were busy with college at the time. It didn't help that I had sent them a list of nearly 20 questions and their English reading skills were not quite on par with my English writing skills. One flaw I've found with being a writer is that you sometimes believe everyone understands what you're thinking. I occasionally even get notes from my editrix Jana that say things like "I don't understand what this means!" (Yes, of course, I re-write those parts! What do you mean, 'You're not so sure?')

So I reduced the number of questions I emailed them and actually got a response this time. Both Mariq and Sofia are studying accounting, which astounds me. (Mainly because I got my only B grade in my MBA program in Accounting... not because I didn't understand the math, but because I thought some of the accounting rules were stupid and I said so. My teacher didn't seem to appreciate this for some reason.)

Kittens Boosting
Photo: Stolen - The Kind of Things I expect of Twins
(Not that these cats are twins. AFAIK)
The twins had chosen to come to Put-in-Bay last year and liked it so much that they came back. I should explain that there is a program where Bulgarian college students can spend the summer working in the US. They get to choose where they want to go from a list of resort-like places such as Vegas and Put-in-Bay.

This was their last year doing this because they can only participate in this program while they are in college. I asked Mariq if she and Sofia had played twin tricks on people (since I would have if I were an identical twin - instead of a third twin), but she told me they were different enough that they probably could not get away with such things. This is too bad, because modern movies have led me to believe that identical twins do nothing but play tricks on the unsuspecting. Yet it doesn't seem to be true. Alas.

Last year we had all been so busy getting photos with the twins, that we had not paid attention to the rest of their group. (For I was to discover that a whole bunch of people had come over from their college in Bulgaria. For example, this year I met Sofia's boyfriend, Vladimir. He was also studying accounting with the twins. Meeting him turned out to be most fortunate because he seemed to be able to understand me better than the twins. In fact, I explained about the the twins being in the Surgeon's Journal, giving him my officious business card so he could find it on the web. Either Mariq or Sofia later told me that they found my page most amusing. (They particularly seemed to think the fact that I had said they didn't answer my email humorous for some reason.) So thank you to Vladimir.

Sofia, Vladimir and Tonika
Sofia, Vladmir and Tonika
Sofia, Tonika and Mariq
Sofia, Tonika and Mariq

The third of the trio of girls (perhaps she is a third twin like I am?) was Tonika. At first your poor, misguided author thought that she was Sofia's twin, which puzzled him because they didn't look alike. Fortunately Mariq came over and all was made clear for me. Tonika had been with the twins last year and I think I met her briefly, but since I didn't have any photos of her when I wrote the Journal last year, she didn't appear there. So let' me remedy that.

Tonika
Photo: Tonika
Tonika is going for a degree in international marketing, which I always found to be a fascinating field. (Much more so than accounting.) In fact, the professor I had for an International Marketing class I took was from Eastern Europe and put such an interesting spin on it that I specifically chose to take another class from him. (Tonika said that international finance and accounting were good as well, but I think she was just being nice.)

When I asked her why she chose to come to Put-in-Bay, she said it was a random choice, but it turned out to be a lucky one. (It's not very hard to like Put-in-Bay.) She explained that last year they had gone kayaking, jet-skiing and parasailing, which sound like just the sort of things you would do on this island if you weren't wearing wool and linen garb. She also said she had had a chance to visit Chicago and Niagara. She told me Niagara was the best because it was such a beautiful place. (I wonder if she saw it from the Canadian side? I've always thought it was twice as amazing as the American side. Plus there are some nice wineries around there...but I digress.)

Tonika explained that she had been friends with the twins since they been in school together eight years ago. She studied accounting with them in high school, which appears to now officially be a theme of this part of the Journal. She also sent me links to a bunch of photos taken of her by her friend Pavil Ilieve last year at Put-in-Bay and asked me to tag people I knew. Among them was a photo of her posing with the medical tools from the Perry Monument exhibit, which I will share with you in a bit.

Kukeri
Photo: Klearchos Kapoutsis
I asked Tonika what they thought of pirates in Bulgaria and she said they were popular. I imagine this is due in part to the international popularity of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. While she didn't know of any pirate reenactors in her home country, she did report that they have their own brand of reenacting festival called Kukeri. Being curious, I looked this up and found the guy you see at right.

Well! That is some kind of reenacting to be sure! Check out those giant bat ears! He is called a Kuker, which sounds sort of cool. "Hi, I am a Kuker. What's your sign? No? OK, no." Actually, he probably didn't need lines because, as wiki explains it, the "Kuker's role is interpreted by a man attired in a sheep- or goat-pelt, wearing a horned mask and girded with a large wooden phallus." Huh. Hey, goat-pelts! Cool! Wiki also explained that the purpose of the Kukeri was to scare away evil spirits with the costumes and bells they wear.

Tonika told me that in Bulgaria they have something called the International Festival of Masquerade Games in Pernek. She and the twins suggested that I should visit Bulgaria and see it for myself. I can sort of see myself walking around in goat-skins and having giant bat ears. (But after that, I draw the line.)

Tonika with Perry Museum Medical Instruments
Photo: Tonika's Camera
Beauty...

(Tonika with the Perry Monument Tools - Note that these are all
G. Gedney Godwin Repros)
Kukeri Costumes in Bulgaria
Photo: Svilen Enev
...and the Beast(s)
(Kukeri costumes in the Smolyan ethnographic museum, Bulgaria. I'd
say 'Mos Eisley cantina' aliens but this isn't an intergalactic kegger.)

While I was chatting with Tonika and the twins, the rest of the crew started to drift off. Mary and Cheeky had left with the first wave to go check on their tent and several others gradually followed. Eventually it was just me Becci of the Sos Boss Crew
Photo: Sos Boss
Becci of the Sos Boss Collective
and the Sos Boss crew sitting at the bar in T&Js. They were debating what to do from there. During this debate, I ordered something I forget the name of that Becci suggested. It contained Tabasco sauce, so I didn't find it quite as refreshing as she did. (If God had wanted us to put Tabasco sauce in our drinks, He wouldn't have made it taste like that.) The debate over what to do was finally settled resulting in Dave and Becci going back to the Site A camp for some reason while Carla waited with me for them to return. (I don't know how I got roped into becoming a facet of this - I was just sitting there trying to avoid going back to camp.)

While waiting, Carla told me that Becci was leaving the Sos Boss collective to take a job with Ford in Kansas. I registered concern. I wasn't aware a member of the collective could be allowed to leave! Carla noted that this would probably be her last event with them, at least for a while, so they all intended to have a good time this weekend. (I would think the first thing Becci would do to have a good time is not drink things Mission, Sidesaddle
Mission Riding Sidesaddle
with Tabasco in them. Then again, she may have not had one... she might be having a good time by seeing what I would do when I had one.)

I also learned that Carla used to be a freelance writer for a gaming magazine. One of her jobs was to go to conventions and bring 50 people into a room to try out new role playing and/or board games. This is how she and Dave got involved in steampunk.

Now, I should explain that the seats at the bar in T&J's were actually saddles. I tried sitting side saddle on one to talk with Carla and I discovered that sitting that way is not very comfortable. Nevertheless, I had Carla take a photo of this for posterity.

A group from camp eventually reappeared with the intent of striking out for the bars. This included Jim Shipley, Vince Gialcalone, Richard Conroy, Ed Rembert and the Sos Boss collective members Dave and Becci. The only reason I remember this is from the Reciprocol Photo Outside T&Js
A Group of Girls Request a Photo. Amazingly, NONE of
them were part of a bachelorette party!
reciprocal picture you see at left. Otherwise I would only have a vague recollection of any of this.

We made our way to the Round House Bar which was positively packed with people. It reminded me of college bars I had gone to when I was foolish enough to think that crowded bars that played music so loud you couldn't hear an oncoming locomotive were cool. So I lasted about 6 steps into that place and then departed to go sit on the porch with Dan Curtis.

We chatted about this and that. It was great fun to watch the people coming into the bar because Friday night on Put-in-Bay is party time. This equates to drink-like-a-fish time. It also equates to bachelorettes-gone-wild time. (I don't know if there were any bachelor parties happening or not because you can't spot bachelor parties easily. Bachelorette parties seem to feel the need to mark themselves as being bachelorettes by wearing similar clothes, silly hats and carrying wildly inappropriate objects around with them. (Hmm. Sort of like pirate reenacting in a way...) Men seem to be able to just go out and get drunk without tiaras, matching pink t-shirts or objects that would make a Kuker jealous.

Roundhouse Bar on Friday Night
The Roundhouse. Look crowded and noisy? It was.
Patrons Entering the Round House
Some Fuzzy Bachelorette Party Folk Entering the Roundhouse

The Golf Cart
The Camp Golf Cart - Notice How George is Usually Driving This?
While sitting there, the pirate camp golf cart appeared on the street carrying several folks from Site A. As much as I enjoyed sitting on the porch, listening to the mediocre band play very loudly in the Roundhouse Bar, I thought this might provide more interesting going, so I followed the pirates who jumped off the cart into... my hotel!

Yes, the hotel had been enlisted to dry the wet sleeping bags and such in their industrial dryer. (I did not get a photo of this. I know you're devastated.) Then they all piled back in the golf cart with their newly dried items. What do to, what to do? Looking at the sturm und drang of the Roundhouse Bar, I wedged myself into the back seat of the golf cart. I guess I was going back to the encampment after all!


Other Recip Photo
An Artistic (by which I mean 'bad') Recip Shot - The photographer
managed to just get Shannon's shoulder in the photo.
than the wet bedclothes, the encampment seemed to have survived the storm quite well. There wasn't really much else to report on that front. Fortunately a group soon formed to go back into town that included Shannon and Trish, Jay and Maggie and Michael Colossimo. The only reason I remember that is from the reciprocal photo you see at left. (If you have gotten the impression that there were a lot of photos being taken with us while we were wandering the streets, you have gotten the right impression. At one point, I stopped asking the people taking photos to take one for me because a little of that joke goes a long way.(Although these photos did prove to be most helpful in reassembling the chain of events.)

While Michael C. and I had eaten, the rest of our merry band had not, so we stopped at Mama Maria's Walk Up Pizza Joint, which is a fine thing to have on an island like Put-in-Bay. As the rest of the crew were eating, I was watching a mini-drama play out at the other table. (I believe the restaurant had two tables.) Two girls had guided a third girl into one of the chairs at the neighboring table and they started feeding her pizza and water. When I say 'feeding', I mean literally putting it into her mouth. By my reckoning, it was probably about 9 or 10pm and Hooligan's Sign
Photo: Michael Colossimo - The Sign We Love To Return To
this girl was so incredibly soused that she couldn't even feed herself. Eventually they got her completely fed and watered, after which the other two girls picked her up bodily and steered her back onto the sidewalk. "She's lucky she has friends like that," Trish said when I commented on the scene.

From there we went to Hooligans. (This should surprise no one who has read one of these Journals since it has happened in every single one of them.) We arrived to discover that much of the crew was already ensconced in the booth nearest the stage. A different band was playing this year from the last two years by the name of Homeland. Michael Bagley assured me that they had been playing the first year we had been there. Since I had come over only for the day on that trip, I had only seen them for about an hour before I reluctantly left to catch the last ferry. At one point, they insisted that all the pirates get on the stage and pose for a photo. Naturally, we did.

Homeland Celtic Band at Hooligans
Homeland on Stage at Hooligan's
A Very Cool Band

-
The Pirates on Stage
The Pirates on Stage - Back - Michael Colossimo, Jay, Harrison Pease, Jim Shipley, Cheeky
Actress, George/Ken, Shannon, Michael & Kate. Front: Iron Jon, Maggie, Mission, Mary
Diamond and Becci

The Patrick Hand Original Planter's Hat
What would the Journal be if I Sold THIS? I mean to say...
Most of our crew in the bar was either sitting in the booth, enjoying the music, or standing at the bar talking. This was fine and all, but I wanted to have something interesting for my readers. There were several bachelorette parties drifting in and out of the bar, usually stopping for a drink or two and then moving on to other bars where the could enjoy bass tones which were so loud that the floor shook.

However, it seemed like a good idea to take advantage of their playfulness to liven things up. I spotted a very tall girl and decided to put the Patrick Hand Original™ Planter's Hat on her to see what would happen. She stuck her tongue out, as you see below center. (In a good way. I think.) Then she put it on the bachelorette herself who loved it and ran all over the bar showing it off. She asked me if she could buy it and I told her it cost me $150. (This is not, technically, true. It cost me $30 and a bottle of rum. But I wasn't about to tell her that. It's 'storied' now, making worth more.)

Pirates in the Booth
The Pirate Crew Sitting in the Booth, Acting Urbane
Patrick Hand Hat on Tall Girl
Tall Girl with the Patrick Hand Hat
The Hat on the Bachelorette
The Bachelorette

Some of the crew spotted all this going on and it naturally led to a round of Stynky's Hat Swap Game. Below are a few pictures of that. (Why we still find this fun can only be explained by alcohol.)

Mission and Tammi Swap Hats
Mission & Tammi Swap & Pose
Matt Jumps in the Picture
Until Matt Vincent Jumps In
Michael Colossimo & Kate Swap Hats
Michael C and Kate with Foreign Chapeaus

Jon with Michael's Hat
Iron Jon Wearing Michael's
Hat - And Proud Of It!
Stephen with Mission's Hat
Stephen in the Patrick Hand
Hat - An Enlightening Event
Mission and Mary
Mission in Cheeky's Floppy Girl Hat Thing and
Mary in the Patrick Hand Original™
Kate in a Large Hat
Kate in I Don't Know's
Hat - It's HUGE!


Mission, Harrison and Tammi
Mission. Harrison Pease and Tammi in My Favorite Hat Swap Photo
From This Event.
Mary Diamond with Doug and Bonnie
OK, This Isn't Really a Hat Swap Photo - It's Not Even Related
It's Mary with Doug & Bonnie, Who Were Here Last Year

Someone - I think it may have been Kate - got the idea of putting the Patrick Hand Original™ Planter's Hat on each member of the Homeland band like we did last year with the Bastard Bearded Irishmen. So this happened...

Lead Singer with Patrick Hand Hat
John (Scott McGillivray)
The Fiddle Player with the Patrick Hand Hat
Paul (Tyler Moore)
The Bass Player with the Patrick Hand Hat
George (Rob Koogler)
The Drummer
Ringo (Jeremy Wasburn)

Homeland in Tricorns
Homeland in Tricorns
This gave someone (perhaps Michael or Kate Bagley, although I don't recall for certain) the idea to get the entire band in tricorns so they could be pirates as well. Homeland even brought us up on their Facebook Fan Page, which was sort of neat. (But which no longer exists.)

Now, some of you regular readers may be wondering why Lob hasn't Lob, having other Plans
Photo: The Bagleys
Lob, Having Other Plans
made an appearance yet. In fact, I was wondering why Lob hasn't made an appearance yet. So I checked into it and... well, Lob is a swinging monkey (literally and figuratively.) He waits all year for this event so he can break lose from he captors and 'do' the town of Put-in-Bay as we saw last year. So he was off at some other place, no doubt one that played music with a bone-rattling thump-thump-thump bass. You know the kind that appeals to bachelorette parties who started drinking on the ferry on the way over. Lob was most likely drinking, smoking and doing naughty things, which the bachelorette parties took photos of with their smart phones. If only we had access to the Facebook pages of all the bachelorette party girls who were there this weekend, we might be able to reconstruct Lob's movements on Friday. Alas.

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