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Pirates in Paradise 2008 - Key West, Fl

People eating dinner at the Hide
(Photo: Mary Diamond)
Dinner at the hide. (Maybe not Thursday, but dinner...)
Chapter 2nd - Telling of the first night's dinner, parking and scheduling issues, the events of the poorly named Buxom Wench and Bad Ass Pirate Contest and the walk home with the wondrous Patrick Hand.

12/3/08, Evening Tonight was the first dinner at Sealkie's Hide - Silkie's extraordinary ordinary. Sacred Heart was cooking beef stew which didn't really sound like something your ol' vegetarian surgeon would be inclined toward. So I left the fort about sunset to get garbed up for the Buxom Wench and Bad Ass Pirate Contest (This name needs to be seriously re-thought…) Then I toddled over to Keith and Lily's to await leaving. However, in typical Key West fashion, both the time and location changed. So the crew at the Wayward Home for Pirates was heading back to the fort for dinner. I said I thought I might wander back to Chaise Mission for a quick PBJ. However, the crew convinced me that they had enough crackers and fruit to fulfill my needs, so I figured I may as well tag along.


Willie Wobble's rope-wrapped bottles
(Photo: Mission)
Bless my soul if the Sacred Heart crew in the person of Fayma hadn't prepared something veggie for me without my even committing to the dinner! (Thanks Fayma!) I dined in fine style on borrowed tableware and all was good.

Then I wandered over to Willie Wobble's place where he, William and Bruce of the St. Augustine group had met up with Delana. This is the girl who showed up last year on a whim and covered her pup tent with a canvas sheet to fit it into the site at William's behest.

Here I was fed rum and hummus. And when I say fed, I mean literally fed, as Delana was scooping the stuff on crackers and popping it into my mouth. (See menu at left.) They then left for the event, so I went back to the Archangel/Mercury camp to await my group.


The Archangels looking disgruntled at something
(Photo: "Poppa Ratsey", Callahan Digital Art)
The Archangels really selling the Buxom Wench Contest!
Alas, my group was not so time conscious and we didn't get going until well after the event started. I rode with Mary Diamond, Dutch and Grace. Mary and husband Mark had arrived whilst I was typing that last bit and set up the honeymoon suite tent in my absence. Mary brought a really cool piece of leather for me to wrap my "pointy bits" (Surgical instruments...what were you thinking?) inside. I also stuck my new bone saw (which actually arrived in time for me to bring it to the event) in there for good measure.

Despite leaving late, we managed to park for free (which is no mean feat in downtown Key West) and proceeded to walk the wrong way to Schooner Wharf. Upon reaching a dead end, we turned around and then walked approximately 37 miles in the right direction and eventually arrived at Schooner Wharf where something was going on.

Alas, I cannot really say what it was that was going on, but Spike was on the stage and loads of pirates were there listening to him although I sincerely cannot see how they understand one word of it.


Stynky with a mug of something
(Photo: Mission Collection)
Stynky Tudor found me sitting and waiting for a drink. This allowed us to rekindle our warm relationship wherein he calls me and swears at me on my cell phone. (I still have that message on my phone - I saved it. You will pay, Stynky!)

We chatted for awhile and then Delana came 'round and offered us a swig of grog, the recipe for which she assured us she got off the internet. She explained the Stynky had told her how to make it last year. Stynky disavowed all knowledge of this event and claimed he didn't make it that way.

I also ran into Patrick Hand, who had ridden with Willie Wobble's group to the bar. He looked a bit bedraggled, no doubt due in part to 22 hours of air travel on the heels of a full work day. He said he was thinking about walking back after he finished his drink, so I volunteered to go with him as my crowd tolerance quotient was full to overflowing. (The bar was packed.) Delana wanted to go as well. So we all set out for the walk back to the park, making our way down Duval.

Patrick Hand sitting on the fort wall.
(Photo: Mission)
Friends and pirates, I must say that Patrick (right) is not only a Prince of a Pirate, but he is a master comprehender (which is not a word) of human nature as well. I can only wish I could understand the world the in the way he does. While I have held him in high esteem from last year's outing, I must now elevate the man a step. He is truly a Pirate's Pirate. Whatever that might mean.

We stopped at the Green Parrot for a quick one on the way back where Patrick gave me a bit of philosophy for free in the bargain. Alas, I cannot actually use this bit of wisdom, but I appreciate it nonetheless. There are moments when I wish I was another human being entirely, but as Delana more or less explained earlier in the evening, that is not only absurd, it is impossible.

Patrick explained his latest work in the Steampunk realm while Delana danced and made friends with the patrons (She is interesting - people like her fascinate me.) Then I came back here to ponder life and my navel in one fell swoop. (And that's no easy trick - just try it for yourself sometime.)

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